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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24564220">just like kisses on the necks of best friends</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/radioteeth/pseuds/radioteeth'>radioteeth</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys - My Chemical Romance (Album), My Chemical Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, M/M, Multi, Other, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Yearning, this is NOT a happy fic but i promise it will give you sad gay feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:07:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,130</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24564220</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/radioteeth/pseuds/radioteeth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“I’m not supposed t’ fall in love,” they whisper, and it feels awkward to say it like that, just out in the open in a few simple words. “I didn’t mean to.” </i>
</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Fun Ghoul/Jet Star (Danger Days), Fun Ghoul/Party Poison (Danger Days), Jet Star/Show Pony (Danger Days), Party Poison/Show Pony (Danger Days)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>66</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>just like kisses on the necks of best friends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>title from fall out boy's <i>i've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth.</i> thought it was fitting and really fucking gay.<br/>READ JAVI'S HALF OF THE FIC (GHOUL'S POV) <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25758451">HERE !!!</a> ; please i promise you will love it its so good and makes me cry ;___;</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It’s sometime after sunset when Poison enters the Diner. They’ve finished the evening patrol, the rabbit traps have been set for the next morning, there’s plenty of water in the rain barrels, and everything is working like it should, an all-too-rare occurrence in the desert. They can only guess that something awful might happen soon, but they’re enjoying the peace and quiet while it lasts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The cheerful silver bells they’ve hung above the door jingle as they step inside. Kobra’s flicking through a book under the light of a kerosene lamp, and he looks up to greet them with a soft smile and a small wave. Poison grins and gives him a thumbs-up- everything’s all-clear- then continues on to the kitchen, fully intent on grabbing a snack.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Pony’s here. Poison’s suddenly grateful for the fact that it’s nighttime, because despite the fact that half the time they trip over the mess on the floor because they can’t see for shit, it at least hides the blush rising on their cheeks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It takes a moment to make sense of the situation, because they don’t see Jet at first. It’s only after they hear the faint </span>
  <em>
    <span>swoosh </span>
  </em>
  <span>of Pony’s skates across the tiled floor that they can make out another noise. Quiet footsteps alert them to the fact that there’s more than one person in the room, and they can feel their heart drop to their stomach, and their blush has </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely </span>
  </em>
  <span>faded by now- they just feel cold and numb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Pois,” Pony giggles, leaning down to hug them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison lets themself be lifted off the floor just a tad, and returns the hug, taking a deep breath to try and steady their nerves. The clicking of Pony’s mechanical joints still provides the faintest bit of comfort, at least.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Heya, Pony,” Poison says, extracting themself from the hug. “Am I interrupting somethin’..?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jet Star, at least, has the good grace to be vaguely embarrassed, and hides his face in his hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, y’know,” Pony starts, waving their hands vaguely. “Me an’ Jet were gonna tell you guys tomorrow sometime, didn’t exactly mean for ya to stumble in on us like this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison blinks. Pony seems to get the message, and cuts to the chase.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re together now!” Pony says, scooping Poison up and swinging them around. “Ain’t it marvelous?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison huffs out a laugh at Pony’s sheer enthusiasm, and glances at Jet. “Hey, congratulations, yeah?” They force a smile, hope their voice isn’t trembling as much as their hands are. “You guys’re cute together, I won’t spoil the surprise before y’ tell Ghoulie and KK, yeah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jet grins. “Knew you’d be cool, Pois,” he says, obviously relieved. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison nods stiffly, trying to figure out how to make a graceful exit. “O’ course, man. Hey, I gotta go check and make sure the, uh-” What’s a good excuse again? “Th’ gas in th’ Trans Am is topped off, yeah? Maybe go for a drive, make sure everything’s workin’ right.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jet nods and waves them off, Pony ruffles their hair. “Seeya later, love!” they chirp, already squishing themself closer to Jet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison waves a goodbye and exits the kitchen, breaking into a run once they’re sure they’re out of sight. They skid to a stop next to the Trans Am, pull open the door, and practically throw themself inside. They hit their head on the doorframe and their knees knock against the steering wheel, but as soon as they slam the door shut and shove the key in the ignition, it’s a little bit easier to breathe. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>they mutter as they pull out of what passes for a driveway, crunching over a tumbleweed. “I’m fucked, I’m so fucked.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s hardly fifteen seconds between the time they start the car and when they hear the telltale clinking of Ghoul’s jewelry. It’s a surprise, though, and they scream and nearly jump out of their seat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry,” Ghoul mutters. They can see him scrubbing at his eyes in the rearview mirror. Half his hair is stuck to his face, and from what little Poison can see in the fading light, he looks just as miserable as they feel.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They decide not to ask what went wrong. They know exactly how he looks at Jet, how shy Ghoul gets around him, and they don’t want to make whatever he’s upset about worse in case he manages to figure out </span>
  <em>
    <span>their </span>
  </em>
  <span>issue-of-the-day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Get up here, man,” they say as soon as they calm down enough to talk, motioning towards the passenger seat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ghoul clambers over the seats, swaying dangerously as Poison makes a sharp turn. He doesn’t speak, only sits obligingly in the passenger seat and curls up, hair falling over his eyes. He’s wearing a baggy pair of black jeans and a tattered old jacket. The sleeves fall past his hands, and Poison realizes it must be one of Jet’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That makes everything more complicated- if they tell him what they saw, he might feel worse, if they don’t, he’ll blame them when Jet and Pony announce the fact that they’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>together</span>
  </em>
  <span> tomorrow. Unless he already knows..? Poison spares a glance towards Ghoul. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>probably</span>
  </em>
  <span> doesn’t- how could he? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They sigh and turn their eyes back to the road, their grip on the steering wheel going white-knuckled as they turn the scenario over in their head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ghoul likes Jet. Jet, evidently, does not like Ghoul back. Which </span>
  <em>
    <span>sucks, </span>
  </em>
  <span>because Ghoul’s gonna take this like it’s a personal judgement on his worth in the team, and he’s gonna be more reckless with bombs and firefights and Poison is starting to have doubts he’ll care to see the end of the year if it gets any worse..</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Pony- Poison’s stomach gives a sickening lurch at the thought. They’d been so sure that Pony had liked them back, they’d been so sure that their shitty attempts at flirting and bringing gifts and general overall </span>
  <em>
    <span>stupid </span>
  </em>
  <span>sappiness were working, but that’d evidently been proved wrong. Because Pony and Jet are a couple, and now neither Poison nor Ghoul has any </span>
  <em>
    <span>goddamn </span>
  </em>
  <span>chance with either of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison lets out a sort of muffled scream, and Ghoul stares at them wide-eyed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, I just- I don’t know, I feel shitty,” they try to explain, stumbling over their words. “I’m just thinking and I dunno how t’ fix it and it’s really really stupid but I just- I </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t, </span>
  </em>
  <span>I never shoulda. I don’t- it’s bad. And stupid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pull over.” Ghoul sounds calmer than he looks, and he taps on their hands, trying to get them to relax.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison sighs and loosens their grip on the steering wheel, easing up on the gas. The Trans Am coasts to a stop a few hundred yards off the road, well out of sight of any passing vehicles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison rolls down the window and sticks their hand out. They can hear the steady chirping of a few birds, the ever-present static in the air, and there’s a faint breeze. It’s not freezing out, for once, but the faint chill in the air helps to clear their head anyways.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They sit in silence for a while, staring at a spot in the windshield near Ghoul’s head. They hate making eye contact when they feel like this, wound tight, like the world’s too big and too small at the same time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They take a deep breath before they speak. “You need to talk about anything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A shrug from Ghoul.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You want a distraction, maybe?” Poison could use one themself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That catches Ghoul’s attention, and he barks out a dry laugh. “The fuck are you gonna distract me with?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, it’s Poison who shrugs, slumping down in their seat and kicking their feet up to rest on the steering wheel. They tap their hands on their thighs, and Ghoul sighs, unbuckling his seatbelt and leaning over to drag them into an awkward hug. They shrink away for a moment, then sigh, relaxing just a little.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dunno, man. I’d say magazines, but it’s dark, shouldn’t waste th’ raygun batteries either with a shooting contest. We could always- eh, that might be weird.” They’re thinking out loud at this point, attempting to figure out what they have for options. The fact that it's nighttime doesn't allow for much.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Could always what?” Ghoul asks, and he laughs. It comes out a little bitter, and oh, god, Poison’s completely fucked up this time- maybe he </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>see Jet and Pony. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Make out?</span>
  </em>
  <span> That’s the funniest fucking idea you’ve had in a long time, Pois.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison giggles- it’s a little high-pitched and wobbly, but they reach up to drag a hand through Ghoul’s hair. “Might be fun, you never know. At th’ very least, it’ll take your mind off whatever.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ghoul hums in assent, moves just enough so Poison can undo their seatbelt. It’s a little cramped, what with two people, a steering wheel, and Poison’s platform boots, but he manages to wedge himself in between all of that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison’s left staring up at Ghoul wide-eyed. His hair isn’t braided back today, he’s left it falling in loose curls, and the moonlight catches on his eyes and the jagged scar across his cheek. It’s a little hard to see in the dark, but they move their hand to trace along the rough edges of it. It’s almost </span>
  <em>
    <span>too</span>
  </em>
  <span> intimate- they’re just friends, but Poison’s never been one to shy away from physical affection.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ghoul’s eyes slip shut just the slightest bit, and he sighs. “How’re we gonna..?” he asks faintly, and Poison smiles, amused. Ghoul’s never been fond of casual hook-ups, but Poison’ll kiss anyone who asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just follow my lead, yeah?” they say quietly, and Ghoul nods. They lean up to meet him halfway, and press a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth, and they realize this is </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely </span>
  </em>
  <span>a good distraction. It takes up enough of their mind that they can’t think about the mess with Pony-and-Jet, and kissing Ghoul is just… </span>
  <em>
    <span>nice. </span>
  </em>
  <span>It’s not the sort of spark they’d wanted with Pony, or nervous butterflies when they meet someone new, it’s just a gentle sort of safe-loved-warmth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Y’ not half-bad at this,” they murmur as they pause for breath. Ghoul hums something agreeably, and leans back in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They continue like that for what Poison thinks could be a few minutes, or maybe hours. It’s a brief reprieve from the trainwreck that’s been their thoughts for the night. Ghoul’s lips are soft, less chapped than they’d expected, and he sort of smells like an electrical fire. They smile briefly at the thought, tilting their head just a little, but there’s a sudden chill of fresh air as Ghoul pulls away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison stiffens as he slides down a little ways, barely has time to think </span>
  <em>
    <span>Uhh, hello?,</span>
  </em>
  <span> but Ghoul doesn’t do anything but press his face into the crook of their neck. And all of a sudden, his body is limp against theirs, and they move their arms to wrap them around his shoulders, curling their fingers in his hair. They manage to pluck out a piece of shrapnel, and they toss it against the dashboard, before Ghoul shifts ever so slightly and sniffles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison’s silent until they feel a teardrop drip onto their collarbone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ghoulie..?” they ask, and their voice cracks a little pathetically.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ghoul presses closer to them, curling one hand into the worn leather of their jacket. His bracelets clink together, and it’s so absurdly </span>
  <em>
    <span>normal</span>
  </em>
  <span> for the situation at hand that Poison can’t help but let out a little nervous giggle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s nothing,” he mutters. “I don’t wanna tell, you were just like a fucking lovesick puppy dog.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You saw them too?” Poison asks. It’s a fucking pretentious word, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>wretched</span>
  </em>
  <span> is a good description for how they’re feeling right now. Everything is dirty and </span>
  <em>
    <span>wrong</span>
  </em>
  <span> and they can barely hold it together- they </span>
  <em>
    <span>want </span>
  </em>
  <span>to hold it together for Ghoul, because he feels like the last person on earth they can talk to. They feel colder than they did a moment ago, and they try to pull Ghoul closer to themself, fumbling around in the dark with shaking hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s silent for a long time. Evidently the zipper of their jacket is interesting, because they can feel him moving it up and down while he thinks. “Yeah,” he says, a little roughly. “I guess I was about as fucking obvious as you, but I really thought I had a chance for awhile. And I guess I didn’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poison sighs, but it comes out as more of a whimper. “I’m not supposed t’ fall in love,” they whisper, and it feels awkward to say it like that, just out in the open in a few simple words. “I didn’t mean to.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>contact me on tumblr @mousekats !</p></blockquote></div></div>
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